We spent a lot of time helping leaders to learn what to do, we don’t spend enough time helping leaders to learn what to stop. “Peter Drucker
Sometimes we should not say anything, shut up and accept people as they are and the situation we find, such as … choose to be grateful for our experiences instead of complaining and complaining, being friendly instead of cruel.
This conversation is kindness … how to be kind simply because we enjoy it changes everything.
So, let’s see 4 annoying habits that stop us … none of which is kind.
#1 add too much value
I remember that when I was young, my husband loved to cook and often did these incredible stews for dinner. I did not completely appreciate the magnitude of this gift. I mentioned several times some things that I could add to your creations … Articles to improve a dish; … And he simply stopped preparing dinner. I was an idiot, and certainly not friendly.
I guess you have also learned from the school of … Oh! You should have kept your mouth closed!
It can happen at work … What happens if someone comes to you with a great idea … it really shines? Do you say: “That is a great idea! Thank you!” … or you need to ‘do better’ … “I love your idea but add this to her.”
When adding value to a great idea, it can be a little better, but it will not be executed with the same passion and enthusiasm … You have kidnapped it … and you changed the focus of how intelligent they are of how intelligent you are.
Praise and support a great idea is kind … and add value … not so much.
#2 win too much
What is to win … p. I know better!
What happens if you and a colleague make lunch plans? He wants to go to Max’s Steak House and want Brasserie Ten. You go to the meat house.
The steak is not tasty and the service is slow. What is your job?
Do you complain and say: “I told you!”
Don’t you say anything, but repeatedly check your cell phone and frown in your food … You have the idea … You could also be using a neon sign saying: “You should have heard me!”
You (… could you bring) say nothing and simply enjoy your colleague’s company, making the best possible use of your time together?
That’s something.
I don’t want anything to be well. Yes … I’ve also learned that difficult way!
#3 too competitive
Are you too competitive?
You have had a miserable day at work, but as soon as you enter through the door, your husband begins to tell you about his stressful and annoying day … What are you doing?
Do you say … “You have had a difficult day … that is nothing compared to what happened to me” … then tell everything that has gone wrong for you?
Don’t you say anything … absolutely nothing (… challenging?
How many times have you shared bad news with a friend just to share bad news with you?
I don’t know about you … but when they have hit me with something … I just need someone to listen … I really listen … don’t try to fix myself … don’t try to fix the situation … just listen.
For me, that is kindness in action.
#4 passing trial
I will lift my hand and admit … I can be stubborn and stubborn … p. court.
Here is the friendly alternative … Help more and judge less.
How? Eliminating three (3) words of his vocabulary … no, but yet.
Saying ‘no’ at the beginning of prayer means ‘you are wrong’.
No, there is too much in this situation to consider.
‘But’ and ‘However’ they mean ignoring everything that came before this word.
I really love your idea, but we are dealing with a crisis at this time.
I would love to hear your thoughts on the matter, however, I have to take care of Barkley’s issue.
It is not so easy to stop saying no, but nevertheless, as you think.
One of my friends had to name the ‘Word Police’ to keep his honest … friends, family and co -workers.
Every time I said no, but or nevertheless … every time … put $ 20 in an envelope. To say no, no, no … It was an expensive moment!
She donated the money to the beneficial organization at the end of each week … a good touch.
And she improved … quite fast … It was really interesting to see her progress.
It is very easy for words like not, but nevertheless, to become background noise … you really do not listen to yourself … They are not consciously recorded.
Wrapping it
Time is needed to replace old habits with new ones. Be kind to yourself and recognize your progress along the way.
And here there is a warning … There are no hard and fast rules … use your discernment at the time. The idea here was to make you think … It is up to you to decide what the guy is at any time.
Arlene provides a loving capacity to move to central problems and then helps open strategy paths in my projects. Sometimes, as a leader, I am very involved and
